As you may have already read in some of our past blog posts, we like to interject a little nonsensical humor every now and then, so after talking to Butch about it, I thought I would tell you about the discussion he and I had the other night. While watching TV, we ran across an episode of the “Family Guy” cartoon where the world is destroyed by a nuclear attack and the only thing left to eat were Twinkies. Because as we all know, Twinkies can survive a nuclear blast. Well, Peter, the father, said that the only way they would survive is to find a Twinkie factory and build a new city around it. So that’s what they did and he saved everyone. After that was over we turned to the History Channel and watched the show about UFOs. About 5 minutes later, Butch mentioned to me that the only thing saving the humans from total annihilation by aliens were the attorneys.   WHAT?
OK, see if you can follow this. It took me awhile to understand it myself. Butch recalled to me that the attorneys were going to sue the Twinkie manufacturer because they were making every one fat and that the Twinkie factories are owned by outer-space aliens that came to earth in Roswell New Mexico on July 7, 1947. That whole crash thing almost ruined it. Twinkies were invented in 1930 but when the aliens came to earth in ‘47 they negotiated a big deal with the “Continental Baking Company” and started the company that now bakes Twinkies. Butch says that the aliens are trying to fatten up the humans by feeding them Twinkies so they can eat them. The attorneys who took the case to sue Hostess said that they had no warning label on the package that says, “If you eat Twinkies, you could get fat.” Butch says that the aliens purposely did not put the message on the package so that they could harvest all of the fat people here for their annual “meepzorp” holiday which is kind of like our Thanksgiving. So, being that the lawyers are fighting to keep people from eating Twinkies, and therefore preventing us from getting fat, the aliens won’t be able to digest us and will not annihilate us. He also mentioned that the aliens don’t like dogs and are afraid of them so he had nothing to worry about and that I could stand to lose a few pounds.
I quickly went and made two tinfoil hats for us to wear so that the aliens can’t track us with their satelites. I can’t wait for the next episode of Family Guy.
